Alternate Ending: Isshin's Revenge
by picabone99
Summary: Isshin was not happy with Yamamoto's way of ending the war and preventing it in the future. And he decided to let everyone know it.
1. Chapter 1

Alternate Ending: Isshin's Revenge

**Disclaimer: **I do not own bleach or it's characters; therefor, I make no money from this. Writing is strictly for fun, not profit.

**Warnings:** Possible mention of MPREG and Slash, Language, General Insanity

**Summary:** Follows up from** Alternate Ending**. You don't have to read it by any means: you just have to like general mayhem. Not really any plot to this fic.

This will be **M** due to some swearing in later chapters. Chapters will be short and I plan to post this once a day until done.

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If anyone had been present in the deserted warehouse in one of the lesser used areas of the Seireitei, they might have seen several man-shaped shadows flit around in the gloomy interior.

If a person had been close enough, he or she might have been able to make out harsh whispers that featured the names of several prominant Shinigami quite heavily.

That person might have then seen several bags being exchanged amoung the various shadowy forms, before the man-shaped shadows flittered off: some in groups, some solo.

Unfortunately for the Soul Society, there was no one around to take note of the presences that night.


	2. Chapter 2

_All previous warnings and disclaimers apply. For all the rest of the chapters as well._

* * *

Urahara stretched and yawned as he stared blearily at the coffee maker. He may prefer to offer his guests horrible examples of tea just to enjoy the reactions they made, but there was nothing like the massive jolt of caffeine he got from coffee in the morning to get him coherent enough to start the day. Especially the nightmare pace the last hectic weeks the war and its aftermath had put him through.

When the machine was finally done, Kisuke happily poured himself a mug, added several spoonfuls of sugar and one of the fancy favored creamers he so loved, and, sipping contentedly, made his way to the front of his building so that he could open the shop. Fumbling slightly in exhaustion as he tried to open the door while holding a hot, full-to-the-brim cup, Kisuke finally managed to open the door dividing his shop from the rest of his home. Stumbling a bit in the darkness, Kisuke made his way across the floor by memory, taking care to avoid running into any of the myriad displays he had set up. Finally arriving at the far wall and it's light switch, Kisuke vowed to finally make the time to fix the switch back at the door he came in from.

Giving the switch a flick, Urahara was profoundly unhappy to note that the darkness failed to lift like it was supposed to. Kisuke bowed his head and let out a deep, heartfelt groan at the work he would now _have_ to take care off immediately. Taking a sip of the life giving ambrosia known as coffee, Kisuke was distracted from his musings about whether he had the right parts to tackle the job or if he would have to run out by the sound of loud, unfamiliar, childish voices outside the door. Furrowing his brow in confusion before settling his face into it's normal pleasent mask, Kisuke unlocked and pulled open the door, only to be greeted by the sight of a small hoarde of school age children, with a few parents scattered here and there, beaming at him.

"Yes? Can I help someone?"

"We all won a gift certificate to your store at the library, Mister. Are you gonna open soon?" said a small boy waving a piece of paper in the air.

Kisuke smiled behind the cup he had hastily raised to his mouth, although he was also faintly puzzled. He didn't remember giving out any gift certificates as prizes any time recently.

"Well, if no one minds that the lights seem to be out at the moment, I don't see a problem with opening the store. Please just be careful since the only light coming in will be from the door."

And with that Kisuke flung open the front doors and turned back to go into his store, only to stop and drop his cup in shock at the sight that greeted him.

Every last thing in his store was up-side down and attached to the ceiling in the same locations they would have been if they were still in place on the ground. All the displays, every last bin and container, everything: it was all upside down on the ceiling. Hearing the camera's clicking behind him, Urahara knew that everyone would soon find out that he, the person who always knew what was going on, had been blindsinded. He would never be able to live this down.


	3. Chapter 3

Genryusai Shigekuni Yamamoto was truly looking foward to going in to work that morning. He had been unable to get any work done in an effective manor for the last several weeks as Isshin had made himself into a nuisance. It was always amazing to him the differences between Isshin the father and Isshin the Taicho. Personally, Yamamoto had come to the conclusion, after far too many weeks of dealing with the man, that Isshin the father was far more dangerous to be around. Not that he would allow anyone else to hear that from him: the whole of the Soul Society had already gotten far to much amusement out of Isshin and the whole mating off of his child to an Espada incident.

But now, finally and only after getting help from the Shinigami Research Institute, Yamamoto was headed into his office to spend the day in blissful productivity without any of the headaches he had come to associate with a severely unhappy Isshin. Nodding in greeting towards his Sou-Taicho, Chojiro Sasakibe, Yamamoto wasn't in the least surprised when the other man, carrying a thick stack of papers, fell into place just a step behind and off to one side. Oddly enough, the sight of all the paperwork that was awaiting him was relaxing to Yamamoto. It meant that all was correct in his world and that he could get back into the normal grind with no more crises.

Yes. All was right in Yamamoto's world. At least until his junior assistants bowed to him and then slid his office doors open for him to enter.

Yamamoto couldn't halt his eyes opening wide in astonishment at the sight that greeted him that morning, although he wished that he could. The silver glare coming off of every item in his office as the morning sun streamed in through his east facing balcony was blinding.


	4. Chapter 4

"Mmm...I wish that I could do this all day."

With one last wistfill statement, Rangiku gave one final rinse to her hair and stepped out of her shower. She immediately wrapped her hair up in a towel without paying any attention before toweling off the rest of her body. Once somewhat dry, Rangiku threw on a robe and headed back to her closet to get dressed for the day.

Sighing lightly as she grabbed a shiakusho, Rangiku couldn't help but pout a little as she started to put it on. She had been hoping to stretch the medical leave she had been given into a bit of paid vacation with no one the wiser. She must have done it too many times in the past if her Taicho no longer believed the return dates she gave him and instead contacted the healers for the correct return to duty dates.

Now fully dressed, Rangiku went back into the bathroom to add the finishing touches. After a touch of make-up and a strategic spritz or two of perfume, Rangiku finally pulled the towel off of her head to finish drying and styling her long, dark-blond locks. Looking into the mirror, Rangiku released a scream of horror when she saw that instead of the light brown color her hair turned when wet, it was a deep, dark purple.


	5. Chapter 5

Sui-Feng was walking along without a concern in the world to trouble her, secure in the knowledge that the Winter War was over and the traitors had been dealt with. She knew at some point in the very near future that she would probably be called in to a Taicho meeting to deal with Gin and the surviving Espada, but right now, she was going to savor the peace and quiet that no pressing duties were affording her. And her plan was going great right up to the point that her moronic Fuku-Taicho suddenly shoved her sideways.

*OOMPH*

"What the hell was going through that pea sized brain of yours? Shoving me like that!" Sui-Feng yelled at Marechiyo Omaeda as she hit him over the head while he knelt over something on the floor.

"I had to. You were going to step on it," he said as he flashed a coin in Sui-Feng's face.

Standing back up to his full height, Omaeda looked past his Taicho. Sui-Feng's only warning before he shoved past her was the bright look of excitement that lit up his normally dull features.

"LOOK! ANOTHER ONE!"

Giving a resigned sigh and mentally making a note to track down whatever idiot was walking around with holes in their pockets and spilling coins, therefor causing her relaxing morning to evaporate into thin air, Sui-Feng slowly headed off after her Fuku-Taicho and his increasingly excited vocalizations. When she heard Omaeda's voice suddenly change tone from excited to alarmed, Sui-Feng felt a jolt of adrenalin and sped up. She found her Fuku-Taicho kneeling on the ground again, frantically trying to pick up a coin.

"What is it? What happened?"

"I can't get this little beauty up! It seems to be attached to the floor! Who could do something so awful!" Omaeda was practically sobbing as he kept trying to pry up the glinting coin.

"I thought it was something important, you stupid idiot!" Pinching the bridge of her nose, Sui-Feng then continued on with, "Besides, I can see another coin just down the way a bit. Just leave that one here and don't worry about it."

Just then, another Shinigami walked out of a cross hall near the far coin.

"THAT'S MINE!" Omaeda shouted out as he strained out an arm towards the farther coin without once removing the fingers that were still scrambling to pry the current coin up off the floor.

Needless to say, by the time Sui-Feng was able to drag her Fuku-Taicho away, after several arguements, a whole lot of whining, and quite a few speeches from her Fuku-Taicho about the importance of investments and finacial responsibility, her peaceful morning was absolutely shot to hell and she had a pounding migrane.

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	6. Chapter 6

'I think that I need a new mattress. Man, I feel so stiff,' were the first thoughts Toshiro Hitsugaya had upon waking that morning. His next thought was surprise at how thoroughly he had cocooned himself in his blankets as he had never done that before. As he struggled, and failed, to free himself, Toshiro became much more alert and, as a consequence, he realised that nothing he did was effective in securing his freedom from the mass of blankets. In fact, now that he was more awake and able to note the details better, Toshiro was vaguely alarmed to note that there were blankets on him that he had never seen before. Taking in the designs on them, Toshiro decided that he never wanted to see them ever again.

The new blankets were extremely childish. Some had cartoon animals on them, others had large blocky letters, and several of the rest had sports equipement on them. Letting out a snort of disbelief, Toshiro choose to ignore the blankets and look around his room in case there was something nearby that he could make use of to pry his way out of the blankets; conviently ignoring the fact that his arms were pined down by his sides under the many layers of blankets. What met his horrified and disbelieving eyes was enough to wish that he could pinch himself just to make sure that this wasn't a nightmare.

His room had been filled to the brim with soft, squishy animals. Hanging over his head was a teddy bear mobile. His bookshelves had been emptied of his books and were instead filled with, from what he could tell, picture books. There was a height chart hung up near the door. And Toshiro finally realised that the reason he could see all of this were the numerous nightlights left around the room.

Eyes burning with rage, Toshiro began struggling fiercely to try and unwrap himself. After several minutes, and noticing that he was still not making any progress, Toshiro took a better look at the bundle of blankets he woke up in. What he saw made him want to swear.

The blankets were wrapped tightly around him and sewn shut.

Taking a deep breath and forcing himself to calm down, Toshiro spent the next hour or so working one of his arms free. He was thrilled when he finally pulled his hand out of the nightmare of blankets, until he got a good look at his hand.

It was covered in a mittie.

That was attached to his sleeve.

These weren't his pajamas.

Someone had dressed him in children's pajamas and, as he found out when he went to try and pull down the zipper, sewn them on him as well.

It took him another hour to manage to summon a Hell Butterfly that he sent off to Rangiku. If someone was going to see him like this, he would be damned if it wasn't someone that he didn't have authority over.


	7. Chapter 7

"There, done!"

Kenpachi Zaraki took a step back and admired his hair in the mirror in front of him. It took forever to style, but it was worth it for the intimidation factor it imparted to those he fought against. And while the bells were a nightmare to attach, they were worth it as well since they gave him a quick way to judge his opponents.

*CRASH*

Kenpachi winced when he heard the crashing noise coming from the vacinity of his living room. When he found out who gave Yachiru that bag of chocolate covered coffee beans, he was going to have a few choice words with them and then lock them into a small room with his daughter. She had been bouncing off the walls of their quarters all morning and it had taken Kenpachi much longer than usual to get their morning routine done. Yachiru had, in no way, shape, or form, wanted to settle down enough to get dressed and, when presented with breakfast, had said that she was full and dropped an empty bag on the table. That was when Kenpachi was finally able to read what type of candy she had gotten ahold of.

*GIGGLEGIGGLESQUEAL*

*CRASH*

Rubbing his hands briskly over his face, Kenpachi was grateful that he had established some ground rules with his adoptive daughter all those years ago. The one that he was most thankful for at the moment was that his bedroom, closet, and bathroom were absolutely off limits to her. It took a while, but eventually she learned to stand outside the door and call to him if she needed him for something while he was in his private domain.

Deciding that he had taken long enough and that he should be getting over to his division to find someone to fight against, Kenpachi gave his hair one last dousing of hairspray before he made his way out of his sanctuary.

He only had time to notice that his living room was _much_ more colorful than he remembered before his vision was blocked by a cloud of glittering pinkness. When his vision cleared, he discovered, upon looking down, that he was covered in pink glitter. Tensing slightly as he remembered that he had just sprayed his hair and that the spikes might still have been tacky, Kenpachi reached up a wary hand and wasn't that surprised to discover that the glitter was coating the spikes he had styled his hair into.

"Kenny! You weren't supposed to be there! Now you're all sparkly!"


	8. Chapter 8

*BRRRII-**SLAM***

"If I ever find out who hid all these damn alarm clocks in my place, I'm gonna return'em to tha bastard by way of-"

*BBBBBRRRIIIIIIINNNNNNNGGGGGG*

Renji lasped into almost incoherent swearing as yet another alarm clock went off.


	9. Chapter 9

Mayuri Kurotsuchi felt a vague sense of excitement pulse through him as he made his way to the main computer room of his Division. The only reason that he could have been called into the office by one of his many peons at this ungodly hour was if a new Hollow had been discovered. After all, he had given orders. He had also made sure that the last person to disregard his orders had become an object lesson to those morons serving under him. The fleeting sense of excitement left him however, when he finally arrived at his destination.

Sliding the doors open, Mayuri was met by a room that was as black as pitch except for the occasional beams of light that would break the endless darkness and instead of being greeted appropriately by his cowed underlings, the clueless idiots were babbling at each other at high speeds and loud volumes.

"Cease this nonsense at once!" Mayuri spat out. Once he was sure that he had everyone's attention re-focused on him only, Mayuri continued. "Now then. I wish to be informed of what _exactly_ I've been called in for and if it had something to do with how you are currently proving my personal hypothesis about how you are all descended from brainless animals to be correct."

There was some shuffling in the darkness before a hapless Shinigami was pushed foward.

"Um, Taicho sir. All departments within the Division were functioning normally until an hour ago, which is the last time anyone can recall any details. Those of us who were in the building all had the same experience. One moment we were going about our duties as assigned, then we all seemed to "wake-up". Only it was an hour later and all the power had been cut to the building, including the auxillary power."

"Yes, very well," Mayuri hissed out in displeasure. "I suppose that I should be here for that. But make no mistake, those who were on duty tonight shall be seeing me for falling asleep and I will be dealing out punishments."

In the end, it took several hours to find the problem, track down and install the neccasary parts, and turn everything back on. Mayuri was just about to step out of the main room when he heard loud exclamations coming from where his subordinates were seated.

"NOW WHAT!" Mayuri yelled as he spun around. He was quite looking foward to retiring to his suite for what was left of his off hours.

"Taicho! My keyboard is failing to enter any input into my screen."

"Same here, Taicho!"

"Mine as well, Taicho!"

The aired filled with several more people asserting the same difficulties.

Holding back a sigh by tightly grinding his teeth together, Mayuri stormed over to the nearest console. It came to light that the keyboards had been rewired to operate different screens than they were placed before. It took another hour to sort out the mess and once again Mayuri made to leave his Division, hoping to at least get in a shower before he was supposed to be on active duty.

He didn't even make it two steps before the voices of his Division were raised yet again. Before the outcry could get out of hand, Mayuri swung his hand through the air in a slashing motion, then pointed at the nearest body.

"T-Taicho, si-sir. It seems th-that what I type is n-not what appears on the screen."

Pinching the bridge of his nose with one hand, Mayuri gestured to the female to demonstrate. Removing the hand that was blocking his vision, Mayuri was able to watch the female as she typed in various commands, only to see that the results on the screen were indeed not what she had been typing.

"Is this what is occuring to everyone else? Nod, if so. Raise a hand if not."

Looking around, Mayuri was met by a sea of nodding heads.

After several equipement checks, it was finally determined that the keyboards had simply been reprogramed so that each key now had a different symbol then the one formally assigned to the key. It took two more hours to reprogram and double check all of the keyboards, at which point Mayuri was holding onto his temper with both hands as he made his way to his lab, seeing as it was now time for him to be on duty.

As he made his way to the one place that was guaranteed to start calming him down, Mayuri reflected, not for the first time that night, that his daughter couldn't have had worse timing in being placed on the wounded roster by Unohana-Taicho. Seriously, he could have seen to it that the worthless child was up and functioning.

Mayuri could feel some of his stress evoporate the moment he entered his private domain. Flashing a large, blinding smile at the empty room, Mayuri strode over to his DNA samples. He could barely contain his building excitement at the thought of experimenting on the several new samples he had procured during the recent unpleasantness. Pulling the cabinet doors open, Mayuri was shocked to see that his normally excessively well-organized test tubes and chemicals had been shuffled around. Reaching out a trembling hand, Mayuri carefully lifted one of his test tubes out of the rack it was sitting in. Holding it up to his face, Mayuri released a heartbroken cry as he took note that his carefull, informative label had been painted over with black paint.


	10. epilouge

"Daddy! We're hooommme!"

"Hey baby girls! How was your sleepover?"

"It was great!" Yuzu said excitedly as she dropped off her overnight bag by the laundry room door after having kicked off her shoes.

As Yuzu skipped happily into the kitchen, Karin followed slowly behind, having taken note of the fact that there seemed to be _far_ more shoes than normal.

"Dad," Karin said cautiously. "Do you have company over?"

Karin could have saved her breath because, as she walked into the kitchen, she was met by the sight of that strange blond guy that had been hanging out around Ichigo lately sitting at their kitchen table across from her dad. Looking over at the living room area, Karin saw that all of the seats were filled by the oddest looking assortment of people she had seen yet to date. There were so many people in fact that some of them had taken spots on the floor. And, Karin saw after she had taken a harder look, the majority of them seemed to be sleeping. Karin forced herself to stop examining the room and focused her attention on her father, who had a sheepish expression on his face as he brought up his hand to the back of his head and gave her a small smile.

"Eh, yeah," Isshin's face morphed from sheepish to hopeful as he looked over to Yuzu, who was standing in front of the refridgerator. "Yuzu honey, could you please do your old man a favor and put aluminum foil on the shopping list while you're over there? We seem to be out."

Yuzu smiled over at her father as she responded.

"Oh no, Daddy! We have plenty! I just stocked up on it last time I went shopping because the store was having such a great sale."

Karin couldn't describe the look that crossed her father's face at that moment, but if she had to guess, it would have been immense satisfaction.

"I'm sorry honey, but my friends and I used it all up while you were gone."

The strange, blond kid looked like he was going to split his face wide open if he kept grinning like that, Karin thought. He started snickering when Isshin asked Yuzu to write super glue, sewing thread, and some art supplies as well.

"ART SUPPLIES?" Karin couldn't stop herself from blurting out. "What have you been up to, Goat-face?"

"Nothing!" Isshin turned an innocent expression her way. "I decided that with you kids getting older and not being around as much that I should get a hobby. You know. So I can get out and meet new people! What you see is the first meeting of my Art Therapy Class."

The whole time Isshin had been talking, the blond guy' snickers had gotten louder and longer until he was full out laughing. When Isshin mentioned the Art Therapy Class, the guy fell off his chair onto the floor he was laughing so hard.

"Oh by the way Yuzu, I really loved those chocolate-covered coffee beans you gave me for my last birthday. Do you think that you could add those to the list as well? Please?"

"So, Dad..." Karin causually stated as she let her eyes roam over the miscellanious assortment of people sprawled throughout their living room.

"Hhmm?"

"How often is this...'Art Therapy Class' meeting?"

"Oh, I'd say about once a week," Isshin said as he made eye contact with the blonde across the table who had finally regained some composure and was re-seating himself. "But no set day. It'll be more fun if it's a surprise."

* * *

_Well, I hope everyone enjoyed this story. This is the last chapter. There will be one more story _Alternate Ending: Ichigo's Finale_ that I will get posted before the end of summer that will be from Ichigo's point of view. I am currently working on finishing up the promised bonus to _Wedding Night Mishap_ and will be posting that soon._

_I want to thank those that read this fic, give a shout out to those who alerted or fav'd it, and give a massive plate of fresh-baked goodness to the few who took the time to review. Namely:_

Dark Inu Fan

darkhuntressxir

PhantoMNiGHT321

_No matter the size of the review, just a few words is enough to make a writer's day. I know reviews always make me squeal._

_If you have any questions on what the pranks were, feel free to PM me and I will be happy to explain._


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